While reading the paper I came across an obituary for a young man (I say young because he was only 43, which depending on your perspective may seem "old"-but I suspect young for anyone reading that particular page of the paper. This man had employed my son for a time, and in that brief period demonstrated a joy for life and a caring for others that clearly extended well beyond his family. It is by far not the first time my son in his 30+ years has been touched by the death of those near him, which is a sad statement in itself but one that I realize is shared in a much larger way by many others. It is often a goal to protect our children from this reality-but sometimes life (or death) takes that option away from us, and that door, once opened, cannot be closed-at least for me.
As a parent raising children, I often felt that one of the hardest things was dealing with the hurts that couldn't be kissed away: the exclusion to the birthday party or outing, the loss for whatever reason of a good friend. I don't think that ever stops-no one wants to see a loved one hurting, whether it's a child or not. The challenge became to do what I could to help develop the skills that would work to deal with hurts-and here's the challenge-those skills are different for each person. My life philosophy, colored as it will be by my personal experiences, will put me on a unique path, as will anyone else's. I realized this morning (again) that the real challenge may be in trusting that as adults, my children have likely developed those skills-and once again I need to step back and trust. Trust that those skills will be there, and that if I truly believe that there is a good to be found in everything (not that I am always successful in finding it!), then the same is true for my children.
So I'm off on my run, to work on trust and faith!
RIP Sean, and peace to your family
